Needing Him

I’ve always used writing to help me with hard places in life.  🙂

This week we began homeschooling in earnest, and Nathan began studying/writing full time again (for the last semester, hopefully!).  I don’t plan on complaining, but I just need to say – homeschooling is hard.  Really Hard.  With all the support, planning, help, and preparation I have I guess I kinda thought it might be something that came, if not easily, at least do-ably.  And I guess it is coming along, Nathan has been helping me get some perspective on that (he sees progress)…but even at the end of the week I am still feeling AS much or MORE overwhelmed than I did at the beginning.  I know that there is a spiritual element of struggle going on as well (you know those kind of things that happen and the only explanation is spiritual attack), but I think I’m struggling mostly with how much I’m struggling.  Why isn’t this getting easier or better??  I love our church and my friends and how they help to remind me that only through God’s enabling am I ever going to be able to do the things He calls me to…but I guess I’m at the rubber melting on the road part and feel totally incapable.  I need Him, like I’ve always needed Him, but am finding that I am not good turning to Him and finding in Him what I need.

And I just want to say – I am beginning to HATE the comment “Oh, you’re homeschooling, you’re so ______ – I certainly could never do that!  I’m just not ______ enough.”  PEOPLE – I am not all that either!!!!  Don’t say that!  Just admit – you don’t want to homeschool!  That’s ok, really – I don’t want to either, and if we had any other real alternative that would be ok for our kids we would take it!  But our life and our kids right now, at this point of time, means that homeschooling is the only option for them and me.  And that’s ok too – but I really really am realizing that this is Really Hard.  Please feel free to pray for us, we all need it!  😀

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About nathankathy

Nathan and Katherine Born are two Christians trying to serve God as best they can.
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One Response to Needing Him

  1. Donna Schulz says:

    Hi Katherine! I know exactly how you feel. I spent 12 years homeschooling our children and the first years were very challenging. For me, the hardest part was coping with my own feelings of self-doubt. Sounds like maybe you’re dealing with some of those feelings, too. Here are a couple of things that helped me. 1. Proverbs 3:5&6, esp. v. 6 Put God first in your school day. Every day. That won’t guarantee that the rest of the day will go smoothly, but it will help put things in perspective for you. You are doing this because God has called you to do it. You are raising up for him children who will love him and walk in his ways. 2. Remember that you don’t have to accomplish this all in one day. When you feel totally overwhelmed, try to just get through the day, or even just the morning. And if things just aren’t working that day, close the school books and go take a nature walk or do some finger painting. These are avenues of learning also. 3. Remember that you are teaching your children, not the curriculum. Don’t get too hung up on getting the lessons done. You have to do some of that, of course, but follow your children’s cues. If the material isn’t working for them, look for something else. And don’t stop looking until you find something that works. It may be different for each child. 4. Ask God to give you confidence and help you believe in yourself. Of course, you don’t want to stop relying on him, but you do also need to believe that you can do this. And you can! I believe in you! So does God and he will give you the grace to do what he has called you to do. If you need to talk to someone who has been there, feel free to get in touch with me via Facebook or email.

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