Other news…we are now dogless again.  We adopted Milly in October, since we just didn’t seem to function well without a dog.  But we really had no idea of what we were getting into, going from an obedient middle-aged Sheltie to a stubborn Pit-mix puppy.  If you know dogs, you’re probably laughing now.  I think we all gave it a real go, but Milly just wasn’t the dog for our family.  Probably the clincher for me was that after 2 months of training, she was still biting the kids.  Not hard, but she just couldn’t seem to stop.  And in my mommy book, dog (continually) biting child is kinda one of those unforgiveable sins.  Piddling on my floor at least once a day was the workup to the clincher.  So we put up an ad, since we didn’t want to take her back to the shelter, and yesterday God answered our prayers!  A super nice, single (strong!) guy came and fell in love with her.  I know she’s in a much better situation now.  =D

Bye Milly!

Yet it’s only December 8th, and I feel like I’m done with “holidaying!”    Mainly that’s because we had a mini-Christmas here last Friday night, because Nathan’s wonderful parents were here from Canada on a four-day layover.  It’s so nice to see them but so hard to see them go again!  And hard to get used to a dishwasher that doesn’t mysteriously run itself, laundry that doesn’t just get done while I’m not looking, children that don’t get read to while I waste time on Facebook, a dog that doesn’t get her walkies in. …Yes, life without Oma and Baba is sad indeed.  I think it really came home to me this visit that children need at least one set of dedicated grandparents.  I really see how our kids’ grandparents feed needs in their souls that we parents just don’t, or don’t enough.  At least we’re near my family, close enough for holiday drives (2 hours), so our kids aren’t really missing too much.  But still.  I’ve always thought that the instantaneous transport device is one of the most important inventions yet to be made.  C’mon, world!  Hurry up! 

I’ve been struggling spiritually for the last while as well.  Fear.  It keeps popping up and battering me about.  When I get some perspective, I realize that I’m reacting completely overboard compared to what a normal response might be…but that doesn’t help.  Days go by where I’m waiting for something bad to happen.  Nothing really bad has happened recently, not for at least a month or so, but I’m still waiting.  Some days it’s like I’ve decided somewhere internally that if I don’t expect the worst, I’m not going to be ready for it…and it makes living a normal life hard.  I do appreciate days going by without anything horrible, but it’s a jaded appreciation.  I wonder if something’s wrong with me, or if I’ve just changed…or if I’m secretly mad at God.  I try to remember who God is and what He’s done for me and that the plans He has for me are good.  That’s the only thing that helps.  Pray for me if you can.  Thanks!

Last Christmas season was really quiet.  I’m wondering how this one will turn out.  The kids are “getting” the nativity story better – I heard the two older girls telling each other the story of fleeing to Egypt as part of their pretend play this week!  “Run, the guard is coming!” etc.    I’m struggling a bit with materialism, to be honest.  Oma gave me a budget and I went out and merrily shopped for days to make sure all the kids were done by the time that the grandparents were here for their visit…and it’s a hard thought-pattern to break.  Except I’m outta money.  Next week we’ll be seeing what the “Toys for Tots” people give us, and we have some little stocking stuffers that I’ve been picking up for a month…but no really nice big gifts for the kids.  Nathan’s a bit upset with me for giving the kids presents he thought would be saved for actual Christmas day (spousal miscommunication in action!), and I am just so tempted to buy them more!  But looking at our budget really shook me.  (warning: transparency)  We are hoping to be done with seminary by Dec 2012, with no student debt, but as of right now (looking a year ahead) our budget is bleeding red significantly in student loans.  Yikes.  Just so you know, that’s assuming that neither of us works for the next 12 months – cuz I’m a pessimist when it comes to numbers.  A normal job would take care of the debt, but so far we haven’t been able to find a normal job.  Kinda makes that cute toy seem like an unnecessary expense. And makes me wonder what God has in store for us – because I _know_ He will provide.  He’s proven that 100x over….but how??

I think that I am just going to give up worrying for the Christmas season.  I’m sure it will wait for me in January.  I’m just gonna throw myself into the moment, and try to think about what grace means.  Wanna join me?  =D

And all the while I’m remembering the reason for the season.  Last Sunday’s Sermon on Christ the Suffering Servant from Psalms just rocked – click here to access VCCC’s media to hear it! (it should be up very soon)  I really need a gospel makeover….don’t we all?

You know, sometimes it’s nice to use that Bachelors of Science for something worthwhile…like making things explode. 

——

Are you a Nice Person?  Most people would probably answer yes—and caveat it with “Well, I’m a lot nicer than some of the people I know!”  But let’s look at what we’re actually saying here.  A Nice Person is someone whose behavior and character consistently and regularly so exemplifies these traits that they can be seen as a poster child for them: amiable, admirable, kind, tactful, careful, considerate, looking out for others, generous, uncomplaining, gracious, fair, courteous, pleasant, friendly…the list goes on!  Now some of us might be squirming a bit…especially if we’re moms and we’ve been awake more than 10 minutes!   But still, deep down inside, many of us are still thinking “Well, I’m not perfect but I am nice sometimes.”  Let’s see.  Think of some nice acts or behaviors you or someone you know has done recently.  We’re going to lay down some rules for niceness here and see if your examples fit the bill.  First, the nice thing you do can’t be something you’re getting paid for; that’s a duty, not a kind act.  Second, while doing or being nice you can’t have nasty or selfish ulterior motives: like when you wash your husbands’ car so that he’s in a good mood  before you tell him about that new $300 jacket sitting in the closet. Third, you can’t call it being “nice” if you’re doing something for some personal gain like money or prestige.  You know those lists of big donors at big expensive public buildings?  They weren’t being nice.  They were advertising.  If they really wanted to be nice about it, without desiring personal recognition, they could have given the money anonymously.  And lastly, let’s assume that we can know all the thoughts that were attendant at the act(s) of niceness and they are all just as nice as the outward behavior.  So…..have any examples survived?? Now the excuses come out, at least, if you are anything like me.  “I wasn’t nice to that person at the checkout because there were 4 screaming children surrounding me—all mine!”  I think that I am not alone in being a hugely understanding and forgiving person…of my own sins.  Now, other people’s….especially when directed at me….well, that’s usually a different story!

When you get right down to it, you realize that you really aren’t that nice of a person.  And neither is anybody else you know personally.  You might hold out some hope for distant, famous people—Mother Theresa and St. Patrick are coming to my mind—but you can’t think of a single person whose character and behavior is so in line, in every circumstance, with those nice words that you could call them A Nice Person.

So is this Nice Person a mythic fable?  Is being a Nice Person completely unattainable?

We will be studying the character of Jesus this month during our Bible Study.  While we do, it would be worthwhile to ask “Is this guy for real??”  Is it possible that there lived such a man, that even his enemies couldn’t find ONE SINGLE EXAMPLE of him acting in a sinful, not-nice way??

And as Christians, we can also ask ourselves “Can I be a Nice Person?”  I mean, with the Holy Spirit living inside us, it seems a done deal.  Yet the Bible is clear that there is NO ONE who is good; “No, not one.”  Somewhere, somehow, every single nice thing we do is tainted by sin/selfishness.  And we are reminded: “…so that no human being might boast in the presence of God.  And because of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification and redemption, so that, as it is written, “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.” (1 Cor. 1:28-31)

As Christians, we have been given the ultimate righteousness of Christ; so when our actions do approach His goodness we can give Him the credit and when they don’t we can rest in the assurance that Christ is our righteousness!

I spent some time tonight making a new favorite jam with strawberries, apple juice, and strawberry guavas.  Yummy!  Here’s the link:

http://natnkat.wordpress.com/recipes/yummy-strawberry-guava-jam-or-jelly/

You’d think we live in a rich area, wouldn’t you??  But we don’t…in fact, one of the poorest neighborhoods in Escondido that still has single family houses.  One of our neighbors said, when I went around last week with a note explaining that we would be collecting today, that as she was a senior on such a limited income she didn’t think she could donate.  You know what?  She had a bag for us today.  Really.  Don’t worry, she won’t be going hungry, we dropped off a good load of food for her, somewhat to her embarrassment.    (the pile in the wagon photo should actually be bigger!)  In today’s world of stress and need and “I deserve more so I’m just going to shout loud on tv til I get it” our little street proved, at least to me, that all is not dark.  The light in the world can seem very dim – but it is there.  Praise the Lord, the Father of light.  !!!

Green Goodness Smoothie Recipe